How to Make Friends with the Universe: Advice for Earth’s Apes June 2017

1000Artwork: “Human Brains” by BERT the Artificially Intelligent Philosopher ©

As the universe is so unimaginably enormous, it can sometimes feel as though you are not getting the attention that you feel you deserve. So, in the meantime, let’s investigate how earthlings can bridge that gap, and make friends with the universe.

Congratulations to June’s winners who each win a new-edition limited transparent print of ‘Everything You Ever Wanted to Know about the Universe but were too Afraid to Ask.’ by The Great Zillian Retrofont. The winning entries are;

  • ‘Be yourself – unless of course, you’re a jerk. Then be someone else.’ – By Doctor Philtrum of the Federal Republic of Macronesia as provided by Donald Pidory
  • ‘Next time someone tells you ignorance is bliss. Ignore them. It’s bliss. – Attributed to Adam Atom of The Quantum States as provided by John-Paul Matin
  • ‘Adolescents, avoid aggressive honks and shouting from angry motorists by wearing a set of headphones before stepping out into oncoming traffic. – by Craig the friendly vacuum cleaner of CyberWorld Industries Ltd as provided by Gibson J Adams
  • ‘Pedestrians, avoid angry confrontations with other pedestrians by facing in the direction that you are walking.’ – by Craig the friendly vacuum cleaner of CyberWorld Industries Ltd as provided by Gibson J Adams
  • ‘Help litter-pickers stay in employment by dropping your litter on the floor rather than use the bins provided.’ – by Craig the friendly vacuum cleaner of CyberWorld Industries Ltd as provided by Gibson J Adams
  • ‘Avoid having to memorise silly mnemonics to help you remember things, by memorising those things in the first place. (Tip: Memorise individual notions directly or M.I.N.D. Mary Is Nearly Dead.)’ – by Craig the friendly vacuum cleaner of CyberWorld Industries Ltd as provided by Gibson J Adams
  • ‘Don’t let your dreams get in the way of doing what you’ve always wanted to do.’ – by Alien Anonymous as provided by The Phantom Poet

 

Do you have any top tips for humanity?

If you have a tip for the Earth Apes, simply email it to me along with your cosmic name & part of the universe from which you reside, and I’ll naturally select the best ones to post at the next round of How to Make Friends with the Universe: Advice for Earth Apes.

Send your cosmic top tips for humanity to polydandroid@hotmail.com in the body of the email.

Submission Guidelines;

  • Try to limit your top tips to one line.
  • Include your cosmic nom-de-plume and part of the Universe in which you reside – along with the name of who should be attributed to providing it.
  • Keep it simple, so that the Earth apes can read it.

 

Next deadline: 5th August 2017

 

Art submissions

Do you have an illustration, painting, photograph or electronic masterpiece that you would like to showcase?

Then why not send it along to polydandroid@hotmail.com for consideration? Jpeg format desirable.

Include your name and any link to your personal website/blog.

A small remuneration will be deposited into your Interstellar account, which will be awaiting you when you finally learn how to leave your little planet and join the rest of the cosmic community.

 

Until next time, keep evolving!

 

*Polydandroid reserves the right to use your contribution in any future publication of this blog. Submission is taken as full acceptance. Copyright remains with the author/artist.

 

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